At this time I was also coming to term to all the awesome things a womans body naturally does during sex (I

He lived with 2 other roommates not too far from where I was and it was the stereotypical bachelor pad. Well…not the ones you’d see in GQ magazine, imagine Animal House, but a little dirtier. Dishes flowed the sink and had a strange odor and the floor could have used a deep vacuuming and shampooing.

We finally started to get sexual, this is when I discovered that I wasn’t the only one that was naive when it came to the opposite sex

In the physical department he didn’t have much going for him. He was MUCH shorter than I (during this time of my life, I was VERY self conscious about my height) and had pale skin with black bags that somehow stayed under his eyes. He wasn’t tired, he slept a lot. His brain and mouth were what had me slightly attracted. He promised me that he would have me “crawling up the wall” note; at this time I was still also still slightly naive when it came to men. I had more experience with women.

He also was a bit of a rusher, he dropped the L bomb on me within a few days. I never said it back, I always gave a small smile. How exactly does one be able to say that within the first few days? It wasn’t like we were attached to the hip all the time and he couldn’t come hang out with me at all times (I had a barracks room and I hated bringing people on base, felt weird)

Like most women, my cum is go from clear to a little creamy….creamy cum as my husband and ex FB calls it. He thought the cum was weird and thought women didn’t cum. HAHAHAHA. E. SQUIRTING!)

Our first (and only) sexual experience was one of those that you cannot forget and also will find yourself chuckling at yourself when you actually think about it. Because when you look back…you sooo let this happen.

He tried eating. Emphasis on TRIED….and EATING. He seriously was about to use his teeth on my clit. Like ow. Whyw ould you do that? It was something I cut short for the sake of my cunt and his neck because if he did bite my clit I might have saw red.

After that I had high hopes that he would have a magical dick to make up for the shitty eating and foreplay. I was very let down. I always thought the term baby dick was just a immature thing people said in school but I guess not. He was easily 2? soft and maybe a whole 3.5? hard, which wasn’t even really hard. It was a strange in between thing. I actually expected bigger because of all his stroking toys and the condoms (which later I found out were actually his roommates). So much for “crawling up the wall”, eh?

Not too much after that I had to cut it off. Bad sexual chemistry was just the beginning. The state of his apartment was also a huge turnoff. We did remain friends for a short amount of time. He was one of the few who taught me a lesson: if they brag about their sex a whole lot before the sex actually happens….their sex is really bad.

He was much taller than me and out of shape. I usually don’t judge people by their bodies though…. That’s rude. For him though I slowly started to judge before I left.